Weekly Update: Full summary listed below
12/18/12 Week 38: Weigh-in:157.0 Total Weight loss 56.0 lbs

When I met Jennifer Hawkins (pictured left) she weighed 213 pounds and looked pale and a little sickly, but she had this beautiful wonderful soul.  I easily saw I had stumbled upon a goddess, she just needed a little motivation and direction to have the confidence to see what I saw. I designed a meal plan for us and started a work out regime to not only help her lose weight, but bring her back to a more healthy lifestyle. Now, to set the record straight, we did not religiously follow the plan and still don’t, but we do stay focused for the most part. The main parts to this successful way to lose weight is: Diet, Portion Control, some Exercise (which we hardly do right now), and Sunlight. (Recent picture posted to the right)

The Diet

The word diet has so many aspects to the word and sometimes can invoke a range of emotions depending on who you are talking to.  Most use it for a regimen of eating to reduce calories, however, we (Jennifer and I) use the term for just what we eat in general.  So this plan is to make you healthy which is the best way to lose weight and keep it off.  You eat better, you feel better, and life becomes better as you begin your journey to a new you.

As you may know from our Facebook, Jennifer and I have our nights of eating out and drinking and just plain having fun (sometimes a little too much fun, lol).  If you are not on our friends list on Facebook, take a moment to click on the little blue icon at the top right of the page and send me a friend request.  It is a great way to follow what we do, as we post usually what we are eating.  Our diet is not so much about restriction of calories as it is eating certain food and portion control plays a vital part.  First off, stop putting artificial anything in your mouth.  Get away from all synthetic chemicals if you can.  This includes not just foods, but other chemicals as well, such as parabens found in lotions and shampoos;  things that bring down your immune system. You want your body to function the way it was designed to and not have to fight so hard everyday just to process all the crap bombarding it.

Now I have noticed many people seem to have a lot of mis-information on food.  For example someone posted on our friends Facebook (Tammy McNamara) about a picture of a salad. The poster said, “great choice, no carbs”.  Seriously, that is all a salad is, almost all carbs.  For the record, carbs are not bad at all. As a matter-of-fact, you need them to add glycogen in your muscles and liver. Without glycogen you would be hard pressed to just walk or do anything a little strenuous, and I predict if Tammy stays on her current diet of trying to rid herself of most carbs, she will start to feel run down all the time and without energy (Tammy since this writing stopped the no carb diet and confessed to feeling run down all the time).  Every single athlete knows, without carbs, they might as well stay home. Now, the reason the Atkins type diets do not like carbs and favor a fat/protein diet is two fold.  One, protein is a better choice when trying to fuel your body inefficiently.  It makes your body jump through hoops in order to store protein as an energy source.  So, a high protein diet not only helps maintain a stronger body, it makes it harder to get the energy you need to function, so you end up burning more calories to convert and store the stuff. If you do not need any repairs to your muscle tissue or any other tissue then whatever you have left of protein will be converted to an energy source and tried to be stored in your muscle cell as glycogen, however, this process is not easy at all for your body to do; most of the time any excess protein will just go to waste.  Second, and the reason carbs kind of got a bad name for more sedentary people is when eating carbs your body will continue to convert the excess glucose into glycogen for the next 8-12 hours and store it away in mostly your muscle cells and liver.  Now, because you have these carbs as an energy source your body will store fat without burning it.  Which means all the fat you eat mostly gets stored away as fat.  Now, your body is extremely adaptable and made to survive.  If you cut out nearly all your carbs, your body will change the way it converts energy.  Since glycogen is vital to functioning your body will horde the carbs and use fat as its energy source. This may be a scientific fact, but seriously, dropping carbs to add fat is just a crazy way to lose weight.  Your body is capable of force survival this way, but it is not how it was designed. For losing weight, the fastest way and best way would be to cut out almost all fat, greatly increase protein, and have carbs as your energy source.  Although, most people in the diet world say that carbs will be stored as fat, and yes, they can be, but it isn’t that easy.  Your body much prefers to combine chains of glucose into glycogen and store it in that fashion, to convert it to fat is a long process and again, would only be done in a different survival type mode.  To look at it a different way, when was the last time you saw a fat Vegan?  Vegans nearly eat their entire meals made up of carbs.  Just think about it.

Water is essential to the overall function of our bodies.  This valuable resource is mostly under rated in most diets but vital to over all health.  In today’s global economy there is nearly no excuse not to drink the highest quality of water on the planet. Every meal and through out the day Jennifer and I drink Artesian Water – Currently Fiji Water because it is the only one really offered at our local grocery store.

So, our “diet” is mainly focused on protein, and the rest (carbs and fat), we let God sort out.

We try and eat at least 6 meals a day, so every three hours we are eating. I might add we keep a container of organic spinach which we nibble from and usually add to food we cook. The following is our “meal plan”

8am:
Cottage Cheese & fruit, topped with Cayenne pepper and some Kefir. (Beginning on week 30, added a Monday, Wednesday, Friday Deviation)

Deviations from the above:

Monday, Wednesday, Friday:
Around 3-4 stalks of Celery with Cayenne Pepper and sriracha sauce

Saturday:
We usually have a Migas or Barbacoa Breakfast Taco from some Mexican drive-thru place.  Of course we add Garlic Salt and Cayenne pepper to it.

Sunday:
We usually have a Potato, Egg, and Cheese Breakfast Taco from Whataburger, a fast food burger place. Yummo!

One other day during the week we will usually hit up a taco stand for a morning taco.

11am:
3 cups of Coffee and a protein shake.  Coffee is made with Cayenne Pepper & Cinnamon. The protein shake is usually a Mix 1 Chocolate Shake.

2pm:
Zone Perfect Protein Bar

5pm:
Another Protein Shake, However we usually make this one from scratch with Nature’s Plus Spiru-Tein Whey Chocolate and use Lactose Free Organic Milk.

Monday

Grilled cheese sandwich

Tuesday

Bacon, egg, & cheese sandwich

8pm:
Some sort of protein & complex carb meal… Below is a list of what we usually have.

Monday – Grill Night!

I fire up the grill and cook some very tasty hunks of beef!
A couple of beers each
Organic Mac and Cheese
Organic Broccoli and Spinach

Tuesday – Pizza Night!

Newman’s Own – Uncured Pepperoni – I add extra Mozzarella, Asiago, & Cheddar cheese, plus organic onions, organic spinach, organic garlic, mushrooms, jalapenos, garlic salt and cayenne pepper.

Wednesday – Creative Leftovers Night!

Leftover Fried Chicken, Pork Roast, Pizza, whatever fast food or restaurant we went to last week. I usually just fry it up in a skillet with some canola oil, maybe add some flour.
Organic Mac and Cheese
Organic Broccoli and Spinach

Thursday – Fried Chicken Night!

1 piece of Fried Chicken goodness!
2 Jalapeno Poppers

Friday – Fast Food Fridays!

Some sort of take out food such as Chinese Fried Rice, Cheeseburger, Fried Chicken, just about any Fast Food place is up for the taking

Saturday – Schlotzsky!!!!!

Albuquerque Turkey baby from Schlotzsky’s, Yummo!

Sunday – Go Out to Eat!

Some suggestions:

Sushi
Nachos
Wings
Beer, Beer, Beer
Basically any Restaurant

11pm and Later

We eat lots of Popcorn and below is a list of some of our favorite snacks

Late Night Snacks:

• 3 Snyder’s of Hanover Pretzel Rods & Slice of Tillamook Cheddar Cheese
• Organic Popcorn cooked in Coconut Oil – No Microwave Popcorn
• Any Organic Fruit, I usually have grapes
• Beer

Supplements:

The meal plan, while nearly giving you everything you need to get your daily recommended intake of vitamins and minerals does fall short in a couple of areas. We do take these every now and then.  We actually forget them more times than take them. There are so many different types of supplements, just make sure your source is as natural as you can get. Keep in mind these are supplements, not a food source.  You are not looking for 100% of RDA just a little something extra; that especially holds true for the multivitamin. We either shop at our local vitamin store or order online through Puritan’s Pride and Amazon.

• Fish Oil Complex – Everyday
• Grape Seed – Everyday
• Chromium – Monday – Friday
• Magnesium – Monday – Friday
• Multivitamin – Monday, Wednesday, Friday
• Calcium – Tuesday & Thursday
• Vitamin E – Tuesday & Thursday
• Iron – Sunday

Lets Recap:

Portion control is paramount when eating out. We split all our meals, so if we order a burger we cut it in half.

We have a garlic salt, Cayenne Pepper mix that we add to just ab0ut everything.  If we go to a restaurant we take it inside with us. Consuming Cayenne Pepper is not only extremely healthy it will help burn around 100 extra calories a day because of its thermogenic properties.

Artesian Water – drink it up, always.  Get a minimum of 2 liters a day if you can.  Again, if we go somewhere we always have this water with us.

Salt everything, without it, you will die. Most people do not really know the reality of how dangerous a low salt diet is.  Jennifer had high blood pressure when I met her, however, I increased her salt intake with sea salt and cut out most of her processed salt and her blood pressure dropped.  She no longer takes medication for it or any medication for that matter.

Exercise

Okay, I know, you probably hate it.  I mean lets face it, if ya exercised all the time you probably wouldn’t be reading this. So, the real question is, can you still lose weight following this program without exercise and the answer is yes.  Several weeks, Jennifer did not exercise and the weight still came off.  However, I might add we had lots of sex, so try and do something.  At least take a walk in the sun twice a week and have lots of sex, whether it be solo or with a partner.

Exercise is important and we were pretty good about going to the gym three times a week and taking walks about 4 times a week, but then Summer came and the kids got out of school, and getting to the gym became a hassle.  We now make it about once every two weeks and try and walk at least twice a week, but we do have a lot of sex, so…  Once school starts up again, I am sure we will get back to the gym.

Ideal work-out schedule:

• Sunday – Walk on the Beach
• Monday – Circuit Training warm-up (12 min), Weight Training Chest, 15 Flights of Stairs, and Tan
• Tuesday – Walk on the bay front.
• Wednesday – Circuit Training warm-up (12 min), Weight Training Arms, 15 Flights of Stairs, and Tan
• Thursday – Walk on the bay front
• Friday – Circuit Training warm-up (12 min), Weight Training Back, 15 Flights of Stairs, and Tan
• Saturday – Walk on the bay front

I should point out that we have only made it to lifting weights for the Back, once, lol; which means we rarely made it 3 times a week for weight training.  Of course the circuit training does help tremendously with overall muscle tone.

Our Circuit Training routine is doing a weight station for 30 seconds and then active rest for 30 seconds.  Our active rest is jumping up on a platform 5 times and then doing steps.  It is a great warm-up.

One thing I didn’t mention that we do everyday is sex, I just th0ught that would be a given, besides if I listed on the “Ideal work-out schedule” for everyday it might get a little confusing, as in, does he mean have sex at the gym.  Which of course I suppose you could, certainly might make you popular, but Jenn and I usually perform this exercise at home, usually…

Sunlight

It drives me crazy to see people covering themselves in some synthetic chemical called sun block and then try and take some moral high road if you reject partaking in such madness. Okay, I am not going to get into this as people have some really strong views on sunscreen.  However, I will add they really should read actual medical journals on skin cancer before propagating a regurgitation of main stream media.  Most skin cancer fear mongering headlines are based on some of the worst guess science and yet millions of people believed it must be true; even though we all know sunlight on our skin can cure many, many types of cancers.  Here is something to think about, every worldwide stat will show you more developed countries have higher rates of skin cancer than developing countries and countries with more direct sunlight have less skin cancer than those with less sunlight. Think about it for a while, something is certainly off from what we are told…

JOURNAL OF WEIGH-IN WEEKS

Weigh-in Weeks

03/26/12 Monday weigh-in: 213 lbs

Took a walk a couple of times and started new diet

04/02/12 Week 1: Weigh-in: 212 lbs Total weight loss 1 lb

Lost 1 pound for the week

04/11/12 Week 2: Weigh-in: 205 lbs Total weight loss 8 lbs

Lost 7 pounds for the week

04/18/12 Week 3: Weigh-in: 201 lbs Total weight loss 12 lbs

Lost 4 pounds for the week

04/22/12 Week 4: Weigh-in: 198 lbs Total weight loss 15 lbs

Lost 3 pounds for the week

05/02/12 Week 5: Weigh-in: 197.8 lbs Total weight loss 15.2 lbs

Lost .2 of a pound for the week.  Jennifer started to get scared, but I wouldn’t let her quit

05/09/12 Week 6: Weigh-in: 196.4 lbs Total weight loss 16.6 lbs

Lost 1.4 pounds for the week

05/16/12 Week 7: Weigh-in: 195.6 lbs Total weight loss 17.4 lbs

Lost .8 of a pound for the week.

05/22/12 Week 8: Weigh-in: 193.8 lbs Total weight loss 19.2 lbs

Lost 1.8 pounds for the week

05/29/12 Week 9: Weigh-in: 191.2 lbs Total weight loss 21.8 lbs

Lost 2.6 pounds for the week, woohoo!

06/05/12 Week 10: Weigh-in: 188.8 lbs Total weight loss 24.2 lbs

Lost 2.4 pounds for the week, woohoo!

06/12/12 Week 11: Weigh-in: 187.8 lbs Total weight loss 25.2 lbs

Lost 1 pound for the week

06/19/12 Week 12: Weigh-in: 186.4 lbs Total weight loss 26.60 lbs

Lost 1.4 pounds for the week

06/26/12 Week 13: Weigh-in: 185.6 Total weight loss 27.4 lbs

Lost .8 of a pound for the week and only went to gym once.

07/03/12 Week 14: Weigh-in: 185.4 Total weight loss 27.6 lbs

Lost .2 of a pound for the week.  Did not go to the gym once and one morning ate a huge breakfast taco and then ate half of mine and then ate a large piece of cake. lol.  I know crazy!  She also ended up going off the diet a few more times, but at least she lost weight for the week

07/10/12 Week 15: Weigh-in: 182.0 Total Weight loss 31.0 lbs

Great Week! Losing a total of 3.4 lbs! Woohoo!!

07/17/12 Week 16: Weigh-in: 180.6 Total weight loss 32.4 lbs

Lost 1.4 pounds for the week

07/24/12 Week 17: Weigh-in: 180.0 Total weight loss 33.0 lbs

Lost .6 of a pound for the week

07/31/12 Week 18: Weigh-in: 178.4 Total weight loss 34.6 lbs

Lost 1.6 pounds for the week

08/07/12 Week 19: Weigh-in: 177.8 Total Weight loss 35.2 lbs

Lost .6 of a pound for the week

08/14/12 Week 20: Weigh-in: 177.0 Total Weight loss 36.0 lbs

Lost .8 of a pound for the week (Vacation next week, so, we will see what happens!)

08/21/12 Week 21: Weigh-in: 176.8 Total Weight loss 36.2 lbs

Lost .2 of a pound for the week.  Vegas was a mecca of fast food and free alcohol.  It really tested our resolve and I ended up eating a lot of Jenn’s food, but in the end she still pulled it off. (barely)

08/28/12 Week 22: Weigh-in: 173.6 Total Weight loss 39.4 lbs

Lost 3.2 pounds for the week. Jennifer’s mother passed away and it has been a very hard week.  She tells me she must have cried the pounds away in tears.  She really didn’t eat too much and slept a lot.

09/04/12 Week 23: Weigh-in: 172.2 Total Weight loss 40.80 lbs

Lost 1.4 lbs for the week!

09/11/12 Week 24: Weigh-in: 171.2 Total Weight loss 41.80 lbs

Still going strong and lost another pound this week!

09/18/12 Week 25: Weigh-in: 169.6 Total Weight loss 43.40 lbs

After not working out for the whole summer we started going to the gym again!  Jennifer  lost 1.6 pounds this week!

09/25/12 Week 26: Weigh-in: 169.2 Total Weight loss 43.80 lbs

After working out last week and gaining some muscle back her weight loss was understandable not has much as has been lately, but she is losing inches faster! Her weight loss this week was .4 of a pound.

10/02/12 Week 27: Weigh-in: 168.8 Total Weight loss 44.20 lbs

Another .4 of a pound lost! Any weight loss is always a step in the right direction.

10/09/12 Week 28: Weigh-in: 167.4 Total Weight loss 45.60 lbs

Very nice weight loss this week of 1.4 pounds!

10/16/12 Week 29: Weigh-in: 166.0 Total Weight loss 47.0 lbs

Another great week, losing 1.4 pounds again!

10/23/12 Week 30: Weigh-in: 163.4 Total Weight loss 49.6 lbs

WOW!! Lost 2.6 pounds this week! We switched to Celery, Cayenne Pepper, and Sriracha sauce for breakfast on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

10/30/12 Week 31: Weigh-in:163.2 Total Weight loss 49.8 lbs

.2 of a pound lost this week. That is 31 weeks in-a-row of losing weight! Special note here, we noticed Jennifer drank half the amount of water she normally drinks and this is probably what cause her to only lose .2 of a pound.

11/06/12 Week 32: Weigh-in:161.4 Total Weight loss 51.6 lbs

Great Week! Lost 1.8 lbs this week.  Jennifer passed the losing 50 lbs mark!

11/13/12 Week 33: Weigh-in:161.2 Total Weight loss 51.8 lbs

Lost .2 of a pound, still losing!  We ate out quite a bit this week and had some huge dinners, but she still managed to take a little weight off.

11/20/12 Week 34: Weigh-in:159.8 Total Weight loss 53.2 lbs

Lost 1.4 pounds this week!  We started juicing for breakfast the last 2 days, but still haven’t made it to the gym, lol

11/27/12 Week 35: Weigh-in:158.8 Total Weight loss 54.2 lbs

Lost 1.0 pounds this Week! Another great week of losing weight!  She made it through the Thanksgiving holiday with flying colors!

12/04/12 Week 36: Weigh-in:158.6 Total Weight loss 54.4 lbs

Lost .2 of a pound this Week. This was a hard week. We had to work really hard to get that weight of 158.6.  Usually, on Friday we do a walk/run/stairs/hike in the hot sun to guarantee a low weight for the week, but after Friday, she still hadn’t beaten her weight from the week before, so we repeated the processes on Saturday and managed to get a lower weight.  I hope this is just a fluke and not something we will have to do every week.

12/11/12 Week 37: Weigh-in:157.6 Total Weight loss 55.4 lbs

Lost 1.0 pounds this Week! Woohoo!  Great week and still going, keeping an incredible streak of 37 weeks of losing weight.

12/18/12 Week 38: Weigh-in:157.0 Total Weight loss 56.0 lbs

Lost .6 of a pound.  Another week of weight loss! That is 38 weeks in-a-row, incredible!!

Sample of Actual Meal Log for one Week:

Overview of the week

• Never made it to the Gym
• Took a Walk only 2 times
• Take out Fast Food for 11 Meals
• Total weight loss, over 3 lbs for the week

07/01/12 Sunday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything & spice all food with a Garlic Salt, Cayenne Pepper mixture.

8am
Fast Food: Whataburger: Potato, Egg, & Cheese Taquito with picante sauce.  Added garlic salt and cayenne.

11am:
Half a protein shake with coffee

2pm:
Cottage Cheese with granola

5pm:
half a piece of sliced cheese and half a pretzel

8pm:
Restaurant: Take Niwa: Sushi: Half a Mexican Roll & Half a Angry Bird Roll with garlic salt, cayenne, soy sauce, & wasabi. Drink was some Midori, Coconut Rum, & Pineapple juice.

11pm – 6am:
Split 2 big bowls of popcorn added garlic salt, cayenne, and cayenne hot sauce with John. One grilled cheese sandwich with butter and mayo. Split a can of natural cola with John

Work-Out

Took a Walk on the Bay Front for about 45 minutes.

07/02/12 Monday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
Slept through

11am:
Still Sleeping

2pm:
Protein Shake, 2 Pretzel Rods, & 1 slice of Cheddar Cheese

4pm-5pm:
Black Coffee
Half cup of Cottage Cheese with 1/4 cup Granola

8pm – 9pm:
BBQ grilled meat 6oz and a grilled Chicken Breast
2 Corn Tortillas

11pm:
1 Beer
Large bowl of popcorn

Work-Out

Nothing

07/03/12 Tuesday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
1 slice of bacon, 1 fried in bacon grease scrambled egg with cheddar cheese, and 1 slice of toast with butter

11am:
Slept through

2pm:
Protein Shake
3 Pretzels & 1 Slice of Cheddar Cheese

5pm:
Half cup of Cottage Cheese with Organic Pineapple & Organic Strawberries. 1 tsb of strawberry Kefir

8pm:
3 Slices of Pepperoni, Newman’s Own Pizza with added, garlic, spinach, onions, mushrooms, mozzarella cheese, assiago cheese, and cheddar cheese

11pm:
1 bowl of popcorn, made with coconut oil

Work-Out

Nothing

07/04/12 Wednesday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
Sleeping

11am:
Coffee with half a serving of Bolthouse Farms Chocolate Protein Shake

2pm:
Half a cup of Cottage Cheese with Granola

5pm – 6pm:
Taco Bell Bean Burrito & a piece of Steak Quesadilla

8pm:
At Work – Coffee with half a serving of Bolthouse Farms Chocolate Protein Shake

11pm – 1am:
At Work – Half a serving of Bolthouse Farms Chocolate Protein Shake

Work-Out

Nothing

07/05/12 Thursday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
Migas Taco from Taqueria Jalisco

11am:
Sleeping

2pm:
Coffee with 1 tbs of milk & 1 serving of Kefir

5pm – 6pm:
Church’s Chicken 1 Thigh and 2 Jalapeno Poppers

8pm:
Skipped

11pm – Midnight:
3/4 Pitcher of Beer and a Jellyfish shot

3am:
1/2 of a Cheese Burger & 1/2 Large order of fries

4am:
Bowl of popcorn

Work-Out

Nothing

07/06/12 Friday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
Sleeping

11am:
Sleeping

2pm:
Sleeping

5pm – 6pm:
Coffee with tbs of milk
1/4 order of Chicken Fried Rice from Hunan Express & 2 crab rangoons

8pm:
Work – Coffee with Protein Shake

5am:
Work – Protein Shake

Work-Out

Nothing

07/07/12 Saturday

Meals – Always drink Artesian Water with everything.

8am:
Migas taco from Taqueria

11am:
Sleeping

2pm:
Sleeping

5pm – 6pm:
Coffee Black
Half a Large Albuquerque Turkey Sandwich from Schlotzsky’s

8pm:
Skipped

11pm:
Half an order of Bean & Cheese Nachos from Gator’s Bar & Grill

Midnight – 2am
Jellyfish shot and 4 pints of beer

3am:
Half an order of Bean & Cheese Nachos from Taco Cabana

4am:
Bowl of Popcorn

Work-Out

Walk on Bay Front

Jennifer and I wish you well on your journey to losing weight and getting healthy.  Try and remember it probably took you years to gain the weight, so give yourself at least a year to lose it.  If you follow the outline I have laid out here, you will succeed and reach that goal weight.

Stay Healthy and Best of Luck,

John & Jennifer

(Nov 7, 1946 – Aug 23, 2012)

Obituary written by Nanci Hewitt, her daughter Kymberly, and Patti Hawkins.  Italic lettering below was what Jennifer Hawkins (Jan’s daughter) and John Howard (Jennifer’s fiance) decided should be added to tell the story of Jan Bottomstone.

Jan Hickey, 65, of Corpus Christi passed away peacefully at her residence on a Thursday, August 23, 2012. Jan was born on November 7, 1946 and was the second of four children born to Bert Arnold Bottomstone and Louise Genelle Black Fruge in Corpus Christi, TX. She married John Hawkins at the age of 17 and reared two wonderful children, Jason and Jennifer. John and Jan were married for 14 years.  Her second husband was Rey Arthur Trevino.   Always the hopeful romantic, she married James Hickey on November 14, 1987 and lived the majority of her life in Corpus Christi, Texas surrounded by an extended and loving family.

Popular and active in her youth, Jan was a beautiful homecoming queen and cheerleader who excelled in each of her art classes. Jan was talented and creative. She mastered sketching, painting, crafts, scrap booking, silk-screening, sewing and above all relished in gifting her creations to her family and friends. After finishing Carrol High School, Jan worked in the Corpus Christi Independent School District Central Office Art Division and later transferred to Menger Elementary where she served as Art Director until she retired. Jan was a proud young mother to her beautiful children.  Supportive and attentive, Jan provided a loving home, enabling her children to grow and excel throughout their active school years in athletics, dance, art and academics. Possessing a love for humanity and an artistic attention to fine details, Jan inspired her children to follow their dreams in nursing and aviation.

A loving daughter, mother, sister, wife, aunt and grandmother, Jan was cherished by all that knew her. Her grandchildren called her “Oma” and she enjoyed spending time with them at every available opportunity. Jan embraced her close relationships with each of her sisters. Thankful and blessed, Jan leaned on her sisters in times of need and shared years of laughter with them in times of joy. Jan, along with her sisters, could light up any room.

Jan was a member of St. Patrick Catholic Church parish and a life long supporter of the pro-life movement. Never afraid of voicing her beliefs, Jan was known to participate in pro-life rallies and public demonstrations. Jan was a proud member of the Republican Party and knew how to shoot a gun.

Jan is survived by:

• Her mother:
  • Louise Genelle Black Fruge and her stepfather, Lloyd Fruge of Corpus Christi
• Her husband:
  • James “Jimmy” Hickey of Corpus Christi
• Her son:
  • Jason Lee Hawkins and wife Patti Hawkins of Plano
• Her daughter:
  • Jennifer Karen Hawkins of Corpus Christi
• Her stepsons:
  • Michael Hickey of Corpus Christi
    
  • James Hickey of Portland
    
• Her sisters:
  • Sherry Lanphier and husband Odis Lanphier of Holly Lake Ranch
  • Marilyn Lanning and husband Larry Lanning of Houston
  • Nanci Hewitt and husband David Hewitt of Weddington, NC.
• Her grandchildren:
  • Harrison Hawkins, Hazel Hawkins
  • Amanda Riddle, Mason Riddle, Brayden Riddle, John Riddle, Molly Riddle
  • Matthew Hickey, Michael “Mikey” Hickey, and Michaella Hickey.

Jan leaves behind many nieces, nephews, cousins, friends, colleagues, and students whose lives she touched. Jan was taken suddenly and too soon, she will be greatly missed by her family and friends.

Jan was preceded in death by her father, Bert Bottomstone, who passed away on November 21, 1996.

Jan’s Entombment is at
Seaside Memorial Park
4357 Ocean Dr
Corpus Christi, TX, 78412
(361) 992-9411

Jan’s Facebook Page

The following was pulled from Seaside Memorial Page before it went down and those who emailed:

“My sincerest condolences to Jason and Jennifer and your families on the loss of your Mom. What a beautiful lady… I’m so very sorry and will lift you up in prayer during this most difficult time.”
Jeanie Blankenship

“My prayers and thoughts are with Jan’s family. She was such a great person. Will always remember her beautiful smile and kind ways. Sweet dreams Jan until we meet again. “
Susanne Craig – August 27

“Praying for Jim and family in your loss. Remember Jan being one who wasn’t afraid to stand up for what was right!”
Dr. Keith Bellamy

Anyone may leave comments below or if you wish to be added to the list above then please click my contact page and send me an email.

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Click on any thumbnail photo below or above to enlarge it:

In 2010, I realized my relationship with my ex was not healthy. I believed, however, that a “strong” woman would endure a toxic, unfulfilling relationship so her children would have the benefit of a two parent home. By the end of April 2011, I had decided that I would just accept my fate, for my children’s sake, and remain in the relationship.

That is when I got the  phone call that would change my life. My step father called to tell me that my mother had been found in bed unresponsive. She had been rushed to the hospital. After 45 minutes, her vital signs stabilized somewhat and she was admitted to the ICU. My step father asked me to come, but felt my mother might not be alive when I arrived. I packed a bag, booked a flight from Alaska to Texas, and began to prepare myself for the difficult road ahead of me.

When I arrived in Texas, my mother was in grave condition. I spent every day at her bedside, and most nights as well. Each day brought more devastating news; sepsis, possible stroke, blood clots, failing organs, etc. At one point I called our family and suggested they come say their goodbyes.

One day, she showed some improvement. The next day, there was a little more. One day at a time, my mother was healing.

During the long days of her very slow recovery, my mother and I shared many hours just talking to each other. I finally told her about my failed relationship. She listened, she didn’t judge, she offered insight, but didn’t try to influence my decision. Never once did she tell me that a “strong” woman would stay in a hurtful, toxic relationship “for the kids”. She helped me realize that LEAVING an unhealthy relationship takes strength; strength I didn’t know I had. For weeks she fought for her life, which gave me the courage to fight for mine.

I was able to stay with her throughout her crisis because of the generosity and support of my family and friends. My father tells me that because of my daily presence at her side, my mother was able to pull through and go on to live another wonderful year. I see things a little differently….

Somehow, I knew my place in the world for that moment in time was in Texas, so my precious children could be with extended family and feel the love and support and generosity that I had felt all my life. After four long weeks in ICU, my mother was able to be moved to a rehabilitation facility. After getting her settled in and on her way to a full recovery, I was able to return to Alaska. I now had the strength and courage to end the harmful relationship. I was looking forward to my new life and the adventures I was about to begin. As my mother began learning to walk and regain her independence, so did I.

In December 2011, I flew back to my hometown of Corpus Christi, Tx and began to settle in. I will always be so truly thankful for that move, because it allowed my children and I to enjoy eight additional precious months with my mother before her death.

I was focused so hard on this new path in my life. Every day was a new challenge as I tried to gain insight about myself, and started to heal old wounds. That was when I ran head-on, full-speed into my destiny. John and I met on Facebook, and from the moment we began a conversation, we did not go more than a few hours without talking to each other. He  showed me a life I never thought possible. Through his kindness, patience, and understanding I learned that not only do I WANT to live every possible moment feeling  this blissful, this loved, and completely fulfilled; but I DESERVE it. Because of John, I was able to hold my head up and see this beautiful world.  I felt like I was finally, truly able to live a happy life. When I saw myself through John’s eyes, I saw more than just a woman, more than just a mother, more than just a nurse. I saw a compassionate soul…a soul with value and worth.

It was a blessing that my mother was able to meet John. She witnessed as the tiny ember inside of me grew into a bright flame full of life as John and I fell more deeply in love each day. She said it was something  she had never seen in me before, and she was so glad I had found him. My mother had brought me into the world, and now…42 years later, she watched as my life began.

If my mother had not gotten so acutely ill, I wouldn’t have had the chance to spend time with her…. If I hadn’t had the chance to spend time with her, I wouldn’t have found the courage to end my relationship and move back to Texas…. If I hadn’t moved back to Texas, I never would have met my Sweet John.

I now realize that during that time of crisis, that time I was supposed to be “saving” my mother, she was saving me.

BACK TO ARTICLES & STORIES

]]> https://jdsportsonline.com/articles/how-i-found-true-love-by-jennifer-hawkins.html/feed 2 https://jdsportsonline.com/articles/randr/rants-raves-and-everything-else.html https://jdsportsonline.com/articles/randr/rants-raves-and-everything-else.html#comments Wed, 05 Sep 2012 22:25:34 +0000 JD http://jdsportsonline.com/?p=6378 Sometimes, ya just need to be direct and pour that syrup in your mouth!

Some of these articles may offend,  some are just satirical, some are a little too adult, and some are just ordinary. Of course I probably only have two articles listed below, but I plan to have more eventually.

I started this website to help others succeed in different aspects of business applications, however, today it has morphed into a more personalize site.  There is still a lot of great information and it will only continue to grow over the coming years, but as I move on in my life, I want to be able to look back at my adventures from time to time and recording it on a website makes it extremely accessible to me for my perusing pleasure and others as well.  The previous format just didn’t support my occasional rant or that crazy break up I wanted to talk about and although I wrote those articles a long time ago, they just floated around the site without any real link to them.  Well, now they do.  So, sit back and enjoy.

Stop the Madness: The Hypocrisy of The Vegan

This all came about because of another article I read where a Vegan calls out a non Vegan without looking at his own actions.  Although, I wrote this using Vegans as a basis it refers to all kinds of situations in general.  However, it seemed to have spurred some passionate comments.  Anyway, I am sure many of you have seen this before where someone condemns another and yet they do the exact same thing, it is madness I tell ya!

Unexpected Break Up & Road Trip

Perhaps this should have be called Unexpected Road Trip & Break Up, as the break up was inevitable it seemed.  Anyway, fast forward to today and that part of my life is over.

Let one of the last vestiges of this beautiful internet world still be intact, sharing and learning from others.

Computer Issues

• How to Fix if ipsec.sys got deleted and you lost internet connection
• How I stopped Ping.exe
• How I removed AV Security 2012 Malware
  
• How I reconnected to the internet after Installing Firefox 3.6.4 and lost connection
• How I fixed my Windows Image Acquisition Service Error
• How I fixed my Windows Service Error
• How I stopped Goggle Analytics from not allowing my access to a website
• How to Install a Hard Drive Enclosure
• Acer Aspire ZG5 Decided to Stop turning on: How I Reset the Bios From a Dead Screen

General

• How to Sleep for Only a Few Hours a Day and Still Function
• How to Lose Weight and Eat Just About Any Type of Food
• How I Saved Thousands on My Electric Bill
• How to Make Quick and Easy Migas Breakfast Tacos
  

Sports Betting

• How to Fund an Online Sports Betting Account
• How to Effectively Use a Sports Betting Free Play Bonus
• Winning Betting Formula – Results – Schedule

Webpages

• How to Add Google Custom Search with Adsense
• How to Add Google Analytics to WordPress
• How to Change the Font & Font Size of the Site
• How to Center the Tagline on Arras Theme in WordPress
• How to Have Comment Links Open in a New Window with WordPress
• How to Make Sure Your Feed is Updating on WordPress
• How to Change the Favicon.ico in WordPress
• How to Use Iframes in WordPress
• How To Center a Title in the Text Widget in WordPress

As I continue to move through this world so shall this “How To” list be ever in the presence of the internet.

Live long and prosper,

JD

Some of these Articles are How To manuals and some are just rants & raves, having fun.  Eventually I may even add my short stories and a few scripts I have written, “Ya never know”.

Select a Category and enjoy:

• How To Articles
• “How I Found True Love” by Jennifer Hawkins
  
• Memorial to Jan Hickey (Bottomstone)
• Rants & Raves

Here is how I fixed it:

Tools needed: any small usb drive and another computer connected to the internet to download the bios.

I started at this site: http://support.acer-euro.com/drivers/notebook/as_one_150.html

I actually couldn’t get the bios to download because of FireFox or my script blocker, so I selected the link FTP site at the bottom of the page.

I then selected aspire_one_150 then bios and then v.3309.zip

I downloaded the file and extracted it to my little usb drive.

The extracted zip file made a folder called 3309.  I opened this folder and found a few files in there, but I was only interested in two: FLASHIT.EXE and 3309.fd The first thing I did was rename the 3309.fd file to ZG5IA32.fd

Then I moved both files to the main directory of the little usb drive, since they were in the 3309 folder, I wanted them in the parent directory, to make it easier for the computer to read.

I then removed the usb drive and put it in the usb port on the left side of the Acer little netbook.  I then held down the fn key and the Esc key at the same time and pressed the power button. You must continue to hold the fn and Esc key down but release the power button until you see the power button flash, then release the other 2 keys.

The screen will remain black for a while due to the bios being updated. Mine was dark for about 4 minutes, then bam, little guy loaded like a dream and everything was back to normal.

May your computer live a long and prosperous life,

John

My “fantasy” love is where we both fall deeply in-love with each other. A kind of love where souls meld together and become one. We flow through the world and are seen as one bright light, ever evolving together and experiencing what this life has to offer. She will complete me in every facet of life. We will be together every moment of our lives 24/7. We will worship and love each other so utterly completely that when we look into each others eyes the world fades away. She will be my everything and I, hers. We will travel the world and have a philanthropic view of compassion for the human race. Our love will shine as a beacon bringing light to the darkness in all we meet along our path. I know she is out there… I will find her…

However, what I have discovered is although it sounds nice, many women just really can’t open up enough to love this way.  They want the fairytale “prince” and some demand this “prince” but they do not want to be the fairytale “princess” in return.  When I met Elizabeth she wanted this and told herself this would be a beautiful life, but what she was not ready for was the light that would shine into the darkness within her.  She became verbally abusive and somehow I, without realizing it, became a battered soul.  Every time she abused me with her words, I always believed she would change when she profusely apologized the next day.  I wanted to help her so much and I would always be there for her, but eventually my heart was shredded one too many times and this is that story.

This story has now been updated 1.5 years later as the truth of her has finally come out, I will put in italic those parts I have added since the original.

So a friend of mine was asking about her, you know, the generic stuff, like where was she from, who is her family and so on.  Well, when she found out she got exceedingly upset at me for telling someone about her.  That she was a private person and so on (Update: The entire time she was on Facebook and always posted about her life, but I was unaware of any of it).  Anyway, eventually she once again breaks up with me.  Now, if you read my view of an ideal relationship above then any little break up would be devastating, however I had long since let that go, not the core dream, that is firmly grounded in my being, but I had pulled back from her and waited to see how she would develop.  I always envisioned she would come around to it, because “it was what she wanted” after all. However I had numbed myself to her demands of my heart without her giving hers in return and I also had somehow managed to work myself into a financial corner with our lives.  One of the last times during our break up when she said, “I am going to destroy you”, she did manage to delete a small 150 page book I had made of our love in the beginning, when the relationship was new and exciting for both of us. I had planned to get it printed up as a hard backed book from Kinko’s as a gift when she finally moved totally in with me.  That was very hard on me, as I had spent months on it and never imagined she would actually delete something from an online storage place, otherwise I would have made backups.

So, getting back to present, she breaks up with me stating we are just two different people.  She is a private person (of course this was not true as I found out years later), I am more public at least in willingness to share my life with people I see as friends or good people.  Of course I am now becoming more public as evident with this blog, but as for the physical public, I am an introvert, however I am trying to work on that.  She doesn’t like Sci-fi, I do and so on.  She has a valid point about our differences and not-to-mention I am a much more kinder, understanding soul and she will attack anyone if she feels hurt or threatened even if the person she is focusing her rage on didn’t mean anything in the way she took it. (later of course, this was just a defense mechanism if I was getting close to discovering the truth about her.)

Back to us, once she calmed down she realized she broke up and so, she asked me back.  I informed her I can not just take her back whenever she feels like it.  I can not just allow her to stomp on my heart in the morning and then hand my heart back to her in the evening.

She responded via text, “Well I hate this and I wish I had never said it. Do you think it’s for the best?“

I said, “I don’t think we really have a choice sweetie“

She responded, “Why don’t we“

I said, “I would prefer to talk and not text because it is complicated.”

Ok but pretty much you’re telling me no?

Telling you no about what?

About getting back together

You will just break up with me again don’t you think?  It is extremely hard to keep getting rejected

I know it is.  I’m sorry I asked. It wasn’t fair.

Hope it gets easier.  Right now I wanna die

It will… You have a lot going for you… The loneliness is hard, I know too well, but you can at least always talk to me.

I wanted more.

No, you don’t always and that is a huge problem.

Wish you’d give me another chance.  but I know you can’t.

Well, I am not going to be the guy on the side or just some guy you can dump anytime you feel like it.  I have zero emotional security with you.

Ok I will no longer bother you.

Neveragain will you hear from me

See what I mean… you always just throw me away.

You hurt me and push me away, but then say how you want me.

I just don’t mean enough to you

You refuse to call when I ask and every time I have been there for you even when you break my heart.

I will never ask you to be there for me again.  I will never, NEVER TALK TO YOU AGAIN. AND I’M HURTING TOO.

I will be your worst nightmare

Because I said I will not be the guy on the side or someone you can dump anytime you feel?”

Seems a little extreme to hate me for not wanting to be dumped.

Whatever you have to tell yourself.

I don’t have to tell myself. I just have to read what I wrote.

And then read your response.

Get ur things out of my life!!!

Best decision I’ve ever made!

What now

What do you mean? you told me to get out of your life and that you are going to be my worst nightmare.  It seems I have to brace myself for more of you hating me.

No not more.  I don’t think I could feel worst about you.  When will you be leaving.

Please stop being mean to me, you already broke my heart enough today.  Would you please stop?

No, you broke mine

Please doesn’t mean anything to me, just like my pleases didn’t mean anything to you.  When r u leaving.

(in-case you are wondering, she never said please to me and at this point because I refused to take her back she feels I was the one at fault and broke her heart.  By leaving, she means she wants me to leave Bay City…)

You dumped me… You broke up with me… You also never said please, so I don’t know why you think you did.  You also said you would never behave the way you are.  Also you know I am not leaving for months, maybe years.

Yeah and you said you would never leave me.

Why do you have to live in Bay City

You know I do not have the funds to move to a new city right now.  Everything is tied up in investments.

Well somehow we need to cut all ties

Thank god your rid of me

(When I read “Thank god your rid of me I thought she was coming out of the rage and was looking for some support, so I tried calling her and she did not answer, however she did text a response)

Do I need to change my number

Sorry, I will leave you alone, didn’t mean to bother you.

You don’t want me so please don’t act like u do

(about an hour passes)

Why did you call me earlier

No answer?

Guess you’re out having fun

I am trying to honor your hatred of me and keep my distance.  You have made it clear how you feel, so much that you threatened to change your number.

Ok.  Need to know about bank and apartment info.  You want out? I’m giving it to you.

No, I said I am not going to let you just break my heart whenever you feel like it and break up with me all the time.  You left ME, YOU LEFT ME.  Not that what I say matters to you.  You will just ignore it or somehow make it my fault.

It really doesn’t matter.  My only concern now is moving on.  That’s why I need to know about the bank and apartment.

Get my things out of the apartment.  You will be rid of me completely by the end of the weekend!

Sorry, I am not emotionally able to text now, please go hate on someone else.

Really????????? I’m closing the bank account tomorrow and telling apartment office to take me off the lease.  I’m so done!!!! You will not hear from me again. I need to go.

(About 45 minutes later)

When can I get MY things out of the apartment.

Right now if you wish.

I wish you would just take a little time, so we can do this right and make sure everything is done as friendly as possible.  Instead of hating  me so much

I’m not being mean just want this over and want to move forward with my future.

No, I’m gonna need help and I don’t I can get someone at this late hour.  No, we are not friends and never will be.  I want to get this over asap.

I hope your not thinking of destroying my things cause that could really get bad.

I am not mean like that at all… You can hate all you want, but you know I would never destroy your things.

By the time this is over you will hate the ground I walk on.

After that last text she falls asleep.

Like most people we turn to our family when the “shit hits the fan” as they say and I was no different. I called home and was able to talk to my mother.  She was about to go to sleep as she had to work a 12 hour shift on Saturday, she is a Family/Relationship Counselor working on her Doctorates. However, she stayed up talking for about an hour to me and assured me on Sunday we would talk and try and figure out a solution.

At this point, I was hoping by the morning my ex-girlfriend and I would be able to actually talk.  However, in the morning the first thing she texted was, “Will try and come Sunday for things”  As it was a Saturday morning.

I didn’t respond because what was the point.  It was over and somehow I was going to have to move, not only out of this huge apartment, but to a different city and do it all with no money.  If you are reading this from my main site JD Sports Online then you know the season has begun and all my money is tied up.  I mean I do have some budget money, but things were certainly looking grim.

Now she has threatened to destroy me before and even threatened to close accounts and take me or herself off the lease in the past or threatened to try and get me kicked out, but she never actually did it.  However, by noon, she texted she was on her way to the leasing office.  At this point I didn’t know what to do.  Of course I would have time as the lease was not up, but she could try and pay a reletting fee to cancel it or take so many different avenues to try and wreck my life more than it was at this point.  Not-to-mention her physical violent side where she had not actually hurt anyone with a weapon, but had been known to pull out a gun and threatened in anger.

With all this going on in my mind, I called my sister, pictured to the left, and was letting her know what was going on.  She was calmly listening not really saying too much, but I was able to at least talk.  However, she then said, “hold on a minute.”  So I waited about a minute or two and she came back and said, “Dad is renting a U-Haul and we are coming to get you.  You shouldn’t stay in that type of situation.”  and just like that they were on their way.

My mind started racing.  All the possibilities, everything was changing.  During this time I get a call from the ex, she asked when I was leaving and I said in a couple of week since I didn’t want her to know and somehow make things worse.  She then started saying how sorry she was and she didn’t mean it and all that.  She said she would try to be a better person and, well you know, the usual.  However, since she was very calm and she kept wanting to know when I was going because she wanted to prove it to me, I finally told her I was leaving today.  She started crying uncontrollably, saying she couldn’t believe what she had done.  We talked for a long time and although this was my out and it was the first time I was in total control of our “relationship” I agreed, I would take everything to Corpus Christi except one truck load that would fit in my truck.  I would come back and if she didn’t rage on me and became this woman she actually wanted to be, the one I imagined and fell in love with, then I would stay.  This would require a complete overhaul of her personality on her part, not just how she treats me, but others too, the world even.  This is not a total impossibility, but it is extremely difficult and I have only really seen it happen once in my life time that I am aware of.  Regardless, I can leave at any moment if I need to, but if she can be this dream woman, my fantasy love, which I have seen glimpse of, then it would be worth it and I am willing to try.

Of course she will probably make little mistakes along the way, but if she keeps trying and really wants this to work then my life will be complete.  I will come back home to Corpus with a women where our love will out shine the stars.

This next section is my road trip to Corpus Christi. My relationship saga continues a couple of paragraphs from the end if you wish to skip this portion of the story.

My sister and father arrived and immediately started working on the really big furniture I have.  It took a lot of work as I live on the 2nd floor and my apartment has 2 stories in it, but we finally got it loaded and then sat down for a nice cold beer   Once the respite was over, they continued to load stuff while I boxed.  I had gotten a huge amount of boxes from the local Liquor stores and there were still plenty of boxes I left behind, so if you need boxes, try your local liquor store on Saturdays.  Anyway, hours and hours later we were finally finished.  I took a shower and they took a nap.  Since I am a polyphasic sleeper and only need a nap of 10 minutes, I could sleep anywhere or anytime, however I was going on 20 hours without a nap and wasn’t sure how much longer I would last, I was running on pure adrenaline it seemed.  I packed up a few clothes for the trip home and away we went.

The drive to Corpus took about 2.5 hours, it was around 4am when we rolled into the city and it was nice to smell the salt air. When we pulled up to the house and went inside, my mom was up watching a “Glee” marathon on Netflix via a Roku device and she greeted us with open arms.  By-the-time everyone was getting ready for bed, I had been up for about 24 hours.  Although there was a couch made for me, I moved the bedding to the floor of my sisters room as the room was empty.  She was remodeling it and it had this awesome cork flooring.  Nothing like what I expected, but it was comfortable.

About 3 hours and 12 minutes later from laying down I woke to a beautiful Sunday morning.  I went and did my normal morning “work” although it was a little harder since I had my laptop and I really needed multiple monitors, which later, since there are about 5 desk tops and 5 laptops in the house that I saw, some laptops seem to be buried, I was able to hook an extra monitor that was laying around to my little guy.  Anyway after a few hours everyone started getting up and mom started on breakfast.  My dad came out and said he was looking online for climate controlled units and had found a couple.  I too had been looking, but he talked about a different site.  I went to get dressed and by the time I got back I asked my mom where he was.  She said he left already.  LOL, man he moved fast.  He didn’t eat breakfast and just said for us to follow with breakfast when we came, but he had already secured a location and was on the way to finalize the paperwork.  My sister and I jumped into her hybrid car and away we went.  We caught up to him just as he finished getting the keys and to my new little home for my “things” we went.  Unloading was much faster and easier than loading up, probably because there were not all those stairs to climb.

After the unloading we came back home, had some lunch, and talked.  Later I went to visit with a friend of mine, Arnold Rodriquez, pictured to the left.  Anyway, it was good to talk about old times and hear about what is going on in the Bar business.  I still think about getting back into it and talking with old friends seems to light more of a fire.  I am pretty sure in the future, I will re-open O’Malley’s in some capacity.  It is probably a few years off as I have no real desire to start it at this time and besides I am more interested in finding my soul mate or working with her Anyway, it was good talking to him.

Back home and after dinner, we all sat around and watched:

Robin Hood – Russell Crowe stars as Robin Longstride in director Ridley Scott’s big-budget twist on the celebrated legend. When soldier Robin happens upon the dying Robert of Loxley, he promises to return the man’s sword to his family in Nottingham. There, he assumes Robert’s identity; romances his widow, Marion (Cate Blanchett); and draws the ire of the town’s sheriff (Matthew Macfadyen) and King John’s henchman, Godfrey (Mark Strong).

I have to say, as much as I like this genre of movies, I didn’t really enjoy this one.  Being with the family was great fun, but the movie itself was know where near as good as it could have been.  Now we watched the theatrical version and maybe we should have watched the directors cut, because some scenes jumped forward and it was left to you to decide what had happen.  Some scenes didn’t even go with what was going on, as if entire scenes were cut that would have explained some issues.  Overall it is okay, to watch, kind of.  I actually feel it was more a waste of time.

Later in the evening, around 2:30am I finally left and took a walk a long the bay front and it was a beautiful night.  The temperature was perfect and the wind along the bay was howling.  It was great to go behind the Holiday Inn Emerald Beach and relax and soak up the raw sounds of the waves and wind.  I have always been one to love storms and wind and as I got older I developed even more appreciation for the raw power of mother nature.  I remember being in high school and the teacher was discussing Emily Bronte and how she loved to go out and experience the raw power of nature in a storm; stand in the middle of it all with her arms wide and I distinctively remember thinking, doesn’t everyone?  To me this was a given, something I thought everyone enjoyed this frolic behavior, however as time moved on, I realized this was not the case.  Well, me and Emily definitely see eye to eye on this.

As you can see below at 3am, there is no one around. Well, almost, there was a group of 4 walking along the beach running around, obviously young kids, as in probably in their early 20s. I saw them as I was leaving.

I continued driving around and Elizabeth was texting.  She was extremely concerned that I was not coming back.  I must have reassured her 20 times at least.  At least enough to where she finally could go to sleep.  The city was nearly as deserted as Bay City at 4am on a Monday morning, but you could see a few people out.  I pulled into Denny’s and ate one of my old favorites, from the many nights of closing O’Malley’s, the Super Bird and had a cup of coffee.  It was as good as I remembered

I finally headed back to my parents and fell asleep around 7am for about 3 hours.  I had some sushi for breakfast/lunch this Monday afternoon and then my mother and I went to set up some bank accounts in the city, in case I need them to fall back on.  Later my dad came home and made some of the most and I am not exaggerating at all, but some of the best steaks on the planet.  He always does this, I watched a little of what he does, but I will one day learn this secrets because every time, his steaks are juicy and down right delicious.  One of my “to do” list items is to have my dad cook some Kobe Steaks, just thinking about it makes my mouth water.  He just does an incredible job.  Of course we had some beer and some green veggies I didn’t really notice but ate.

Later, Jean and I went to Cafe Calypso and I always remembered this place fondly, but I don’t know it if was because I hang out at Main Street Coffee Bar often, but the mocha at Calypso just wasn’t as good as I remembered, however it was nice to sit and talk with my sister.

Continuing with the Relationship part:

Soon, it was time for me to head back to Bay City, TX.  I said my good-byes and gave my hugs.  It was around midnight as I started my journey home.  As a Polyphasic sleeper, I had taken a 10 minute nap at 11pm, so I was good for another 4 hours easily.  The entire way home I didn’t get sleepy at all and my mind was filled with possibilities.  No longer was I oppressed and felt alone.  My family was there for me, if I needed them.  I was more in control of my future regarding my feelings and in a moment I could start my life in Corpus.  I was a little worried about Callie, my very pretty and needy cat, since my dad is kind of allergic so she could not stay in the house.  However, I can very easily get a small apartment for her and I, if needed.  It was freeing to know I could now live by my own terms and although it may have seemed like I was just giving in to Elizabeth, I had seen her overwhelming kindness in the past and if she could become that person, then it was worth, one more chance.

It is now the end of the fifth day since her total transformation of character and she has not had a single episode.  It’s as if a new soul has taken over and she has been exceptionally kind to me and to others.  I, of course, am holding a lot of my heart back and she understands that.  I will be here for her and by her side while she walks this journey giving her the support when she needs it, but I need time to trust, time to heal and hopefully by walking together we will heal together.

She has been seeing a therapist for a while now and in her latest session, the therapist eased into that my “girlfriend” was an Emotional Domestic Abuser and this stunned her.  Although it was one thing for others to say things like that but for her therapist to confirm it, was something she is still trying to cope with as I write this. However she did not get mad as her old self would have, instead she had remorse and for the first time ever, she talked to me as soon as she got out of the session.  We discussed it and even talked about how it has effected her relationship with her family, something she never really would discuss with me.  She opened up and saw herself and what she had done.  She is now on the road to amends…

G’nite and sweet dreams,

John

P.S. It is now a year later and I thought I should update this page.  We tried for months, but in-the-end it seemed it wasn’t meant to be.  I have since moved back to Corpus Christi, Texas and our lives have gone separate ways.  We text every now and then, but that relationship is forever in the past.  I wish her well and hope she finds true happiness.

P.S.S. Now a year and a half later, I have learned the truth and it is mind blowing. She actually at one time said she had surgery and wouldn’t be able to really text or anything for 2 weeks, turns out she was on a cruise ship with someone else.  She lied so much about phantom medical issues and so often it is just astonishing and sometimes very hard to wrap my head around the complex deception she wove.  She was truly a master of lies and deception. When I asked, why did you even bother trying to keep me since she was lying so often to me, she didn’t really answer but said she loved me in her own way.  The amount of deception was just staggering and so layered like an onion, once you uncover one lie it revels so many others.  In-the-end, it seems life balances itself out and although, I was played the fool, the one thing that did happen was she kept me unavailable.  I am now engaged to the most wonderful woman on this planet and without the craziness of this story, we might have never met, so for that, Jennifer and I, thank you.

I have broken up the year into two seasons: Winter and Summer.

For the purpose of this article: Winter is from October – March and Summer is from April – September

My first winter at my new apartment, I spent a total of $2047.35 on electricity and my first Summer here I spent a total of $1889.52.  The total for the year was $3936.87, that is an average monthly bill of $328.07.

Halfway through the next winter, something wonderful happened, my heater broke.  My 2nd winter total was $1612.67.  When summer came I tried to figure something out and it took a month or two to figure it out, however I ended with a summer bill of $1264.14.  My total for the year was $2876.81, which is an average monthly bill of $239.73.

This past winter, from the start, I was able to implement what I had started halfway through last winter. So I was excited to see what the results were going to be for an entire winter.  My total bill for winter was $775.05.  Can you believe that!  That is a monthly average of $129.17, over a 60% savings, reducing my bill by over $200 a month from the first year.  That is just crazy! This is something I am very happy about, not just the money I saved, but to actually accomplish it.

For summer, I will have my first full summer doing this, but just by doing this for half of the summer I was able to lower my summer monthly bill by over $100 a month.  I can’t wait to see how it all turns out.  I will of course update this page after this summer with the figures.

Savings Outline

• 1st Winter = $2047.35 average monthly bill $341.22
• Last Winter = $775.05 average monthly bill $129.17
• A savings of $212.05 per month!

• 1st Summer = $1889.52 average monthly bill $341.92
• Last Summer = $1264.14 average monthly bill $210.69
• A savings of $131.23 per month!

Now before I reveal my wonderful discovery I would ask that if you try this yourself and save some money that you come back a give a small donation at the bottom of any of my pages as way of saying thanks

So, to save hundreds of dollars a month in the winter you simple do not use your central air & heat system for heating.  This is what I did to make sure I stayed warm.  On nights when the outside temp was going to get into the thirties I would turn on my electric oven to 375 degrees and crack the door. Also, I would turn on one of the heating elements on the stove to medium heat. This heat was able to maintain a temp of around 54 or so inside the home.  Still too cold to run around in, but I had a secret weapon:  An electric blanket. There are many different kinds of electric blankets and you can search for anyone you like, the one to the left is the one I used. To search for others, just click the link, it will take you to the right area. Anyway, under that thing I never noticed the cold at all. I made it through the entire winter without turning on my heater once.  However, I did have my stove on for 4 days straight one time.  So that was all there is to saving a bunch of money in the winter.

Now summer is a different story.  Where I live the apartment complex doesn’t allow aluminum foil on the windows and the outer material of the walls is some sort of stucco that absorbs heat like a MF.  Seriously, the outer walls get so hot you can’t even hold you hand on the wall without having extremely pain.  My apartment is upstairs and once the sun crosses it’s zenith it starts to cook my upstairs loft.  Literally, my downstairs will be 69 degrees while the upstairs is 90 degrees.  It is crazy, I know, but that is the design and placement of the huge window that faces right into the sun for the entire 2nd half of the day.

So, naturally I had to figure out how to shield it.  I first tried foil and got hit with a notice from the apartment management that it was unacceptable.  However, while I had the foil on it was nice and cool.  So, that gave me an idea.  What about using thermal blankets? They are cheap and it couldn’t hurt to try. My window was huge so I had to use two, but as you can see to the left they are very inexpensive.  After thinking about how to make them effective it took me a moment to realize they radiate heat back, hence the name “thermal” blanket.  Anyway these paper thin sheets worked marvelous.  Here was how I made them work almost too well.  First I put up a dark blanket, probably should have used a white one, but I only had a black one.  So, I stapled that up covering the entire window.  I then covered, the black blanket with the thermal blankets.  I used regular Scotch tape for that and taped the edges covering the black blanket.  Immediately I could feel a reduction in the heat coming through.  Then, just because I didn’t like the look of “foil” like stuff covering my window, although I am the only one that sees it, but anyway, I then added another blanket.  Although this blanket was some funky multicolored thing.

Lastly I added some black “Thermal” “Blackout” insulated curtains like the ones on the left. The important thing on selecting the curtains is make sure they use the words “Blackout” and “Thermal” and fit the width of your window.  You can find cheaper ones than what I used, just click the link and it will take you to the right area of Amazon to continue your search. Now, I should warn you, the first half-a-summer, I did this, it actually melted my blinds, the ones that came with the apt. I now just leave the shades drawn up because they are all warped. So, it goes to show you how hot it gets and how much heat is being radiated back and being blocked from entering the apartment.  However, getting  so hot between the thermal blankets and the window that the blinds melted is crazy. Just a warning if you don’t want to destroy your blinds.

Below you will find a video on some of the stages I used for putting up my thermal protection.

I hope you are able to use the information I have passed on and it saves you some money.  If it does, then please, come back and make a small donation it will be greatly appreciated.

Thank you,

JD

The code for Centering a title when using the Text Widget in WordPress is extremely easy if you use Arras or any theme with a user.css. What this does is overwrite any instructions in the theme. So, how does this make it easier, well all you have to do in Arras is edit the user.css with the following code:

.widgettitle { text-align:center; }

See how easy that is, piece of cake.  Now let say we didn’t have this nifty user.css, well then we would have to open some sort of file manager at our hosting site and either download the default.css, edit it, and then upload it or, depending on your provider, right click and select an editor.

For example, I use Hostgator.  I went to my cpanel and opened File Manager.  Then I had to navigate to my default.css.  To do this, I followed the following path: public_html folder, then wp-content, then themes, then arras, then css, and finally selected styles which contained my default.css. I right clicked on it and selected code edit.  I scrolled down until I found .widgettitle and added the following code

text-align:center;

So there you have it, pretty easy if you have a user.css, if not, well it may take a little longer.

Best of luck,

JD